"My focus is everywhere. I just can't consentrate. All I do is sleep!"
All I was able to do was sleep, get myself to work and make sure I was eating right. I became part of the social team at my local Slimming world.
Still I was deeply unhappy. My family was all around me but I felt utterly alone. Until I spoke to my mum. We never had the best relationship but she would come over and help me clean my house. We got a lot closer.
"The only one that truely loves me is my dog!"
I made sure my beautiful pug puppy would get walked daily. He was so beautiful and loved me even when I cried. By walking him twice a day I became fitter and more motivated. It was around this time began hairdressing again. Doing only mobile and fitting it around my eating plan and walking my dog. I then got my acceptance letter from university and I began writing my blog again.
At this stage I began to experience happy days. This didn't happen all the time. I was more often then not on edge and nervous. Constantly worrying about money, my relationship the state of my life. However positivity started to creep back into my life. I look back on all the small things I have achieved without realising during this miserable time, becoming part of a social team, building a better relationship with my mum, getting into university and starting my own business.
We are quick to forget our own achievements, however they are there. A glowing representation of what wonderful people we are and how hard we work. Even if it is just the little things. They count too and sometimes more!
Those who are suffering, I know you feel truely rotten and that your no good. Please remember what you have achieved so far! Even if it is just that you got up the courage to leave your bed! When you are hurting as you are that is quite a big achievement indeed!